Thanksgiving

We had family over for thanksgiving yesterday. It's a weird holiday for me because when I was growing up, I was told I was part Cherokee (American Indian, Indian, or Native American depending on the political correctness era you're in). In school, I learned that the first thanksgiving in America included the Indians of the area, and the Pilgrims. The Pilgrims had a bountiful harvest because of the Indians that helped them learn about planting and harvesting in their new climate. So, when they harvested their good bounty, they got together with the Indians as a way of thanking them as well as being thankful for surviving their first year. At some point I realized it was probably not just about thanking the Indians, but also about sharing in both directions… The Indians brought some food, they brought some food, and together they had more between them. The perceived harmony between them at that time later led me to be fairly bitter when the settlers later took over the Indians' land. Back then, I wasn't as forgiving of my other ancestors as I am now. Now I see things in a different light - both sides had good, both sides had bad, both sides were human after all. Who knows what the heck happened way back then… it's not like history books don't change, so if you weren't there, you are depending on the writer's interpretation of the events, not necessarily fact. It doesn't matter much now, what's done is done. But it still irks me at times. LOL.

I don't know how much of all that is accepted today… the way Thanksgiving is explained nowdays seems to be that it was pre-dated in America by the Canadian version, and American settlers began celebrating as thanksgiving for a good landing, leaving out the whole story of the Indians and Pilgrims altogether. What did I say about history books changing? Meh?

At any rate, I now see it as an excuse to get together with Dale's family and cook together and host a place for the getting together and eating together. I like it. When my mother first learned of my newly absorbed larger family (on Dale's side), she said, "Good, now you have the family you always wanted." I remember feeling baffled by this. I didn't remember ever telling her I wanted a brother or sister, or a larger family than the two of us, but somehow she figured I did. Maybe parental guilt, or something I said that I don't remember but which she still saw. What I remember wanting was a father. That dream was shattered when I learned what mine had done in his later years. No biggie, though… I've had a few good father figures in my life to pull life lessons from, and so I've learned that it was a good thing I hadn't known my father because maybe I wouldn't have turned out to be me. But I digress again. The fact is, I DO like having an extended family that I can be so close to. I sometimes wish we could all live closer to each other, but it's all good.

This is all stuff I've been reflecting on this morning as I sit here at my desk in front of a nice macbook with a purring kitten next to me, drinking tea "la ren cha" style and eating leftovers - this time, pumpkin pie made by my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. Life really cannot be better than this. I realize this rather often these days, and knowing how some of my friends and family suffer through life, and seeing stories on the news of some awful tragedies that happen, well… I know I have it really good. I guess it's human nature to be self-centered and selfish in many ways, but it's so humbling to recognise the streak of luck I've encountered for the past several years.

I look at the kitten and tell him all the time how hard it is to explain to him how much love I have for him, and how sometimes it just makes you think you should be shaking all over but it's only inside. I tell him how lucky I am to have him. He just sits there and purrs his agreement. Then I tell him how I get that for Dale, too, but in a different way. He still purrs in agreement. Finally I realise that he is hoping that the pie I'd been eating, and left a small morsel of, might be slid across the desk in his direction. So I smile and slide it across the desk. He licks the plate clean, purring happily, then hops down and takes off for the warmer livingroom furniture.

The kitten just came back. I have nothing tangible left to give him, but he is hugging me with his paws like he simply wants to be here. Perhaps I'm warmer than the couch. I'll take it.

~w