20100904
One Good Woman review... again, I'm sure.
20100829
Who am I?
20100812
DESK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
20100725
Poem: The Current
2010072571 - c2010 wlc
Currently
Richard Marx plays on my mac
Lisa's scarfing medicine
You're upstairs reading
My everything
Yesterday
So full of emotion, I
Suppressed the overwhelming feelings
Went out to see a friend
Lest I send me reeling
Today
I waded into water
The current took me into it
I felt so weightless yet so strong
Just a candle barely lit
Tomorrow
I'll head to work again
In my heart is where you'll be
I'll talk to people 'bout a desk
But it's your face I always see
Currently
Not a weight upon my shoulders
I ebb and flow, a pond with wind
Fed by springs, both warm and cold
Outward calm, alive within
20100718
Music class memory
20100717
Rule Number One: Cook Lentils Separately
rat a tat tat part two
Rat a tat tat
20100716
iPhone 4 rant
20100619
celery
20100530
Article on APD
it to a T from my point of view.
This main part especially (quoted from the article):
---beginning of snip---
It began with a haircut before her son started first grade. Blake had
already been working with a speech therapist on his vague responses
and other difficulties, so when he asked for a "little haircut" and
she pressed him on his meaning, she told the barber he wanted short
hair like his brother's. But in the car later, Blake erupted in tears,
and Ms. O'Donnell realized her mistake. By "little haircut," Blake
meant little hair should be cut. He wanted a trim.
"I pulled off on the freeway and hugged him," Ms. O'Donnell said. "I
said: 'Blakey, I'm really sorry. I didn't understand you. I'll do
better.' "
That was a turning point. Ms. O'Donnell's quest to do better led her
to Ms. Heymann, who determined that while Blake could hear perfectly
well, he had trouble distinguishing between sounds. To him, words like
"tangerine" and "tambourine," "bed" and "dead," may sound the same.
"The child hears 'And the girl went to dead,' and they know it doesn't
make sense," Ms. Heymann told me. "But while they try to figure it
out, the teacher continues talking and now they're behind. Those
sounds are being distorted or misinterpreted, and it affects how the
child is going to learn speech and language."
Blake's brain struggled to retain the words he heard, resulting in a
limited vocabulary and trouble with reading and spelling. Abstract
language, metaphors like "cover third base," even "knock-knock" jokes,
were confusing and frustrating.
Children with auditory processing problems often can't filter out
other sounds. The teacher's voice, a chair scraping the floor and
crinkling paper are all heard at the same level. "The normal reaction
by the parent is 'Why don't you listen?' " Ms. Heymann said. "They
were listening, but they weren't hearing the right thing."
--- end of snip ---
My own experience includes an incident when I was around five years of
age. The speech therapist told me that if I didn't say what she did,
that my mother would leave me there and never come back for me. I
looked up at the door. My mother was standing on the other side,
looking in, saw me look up, and smiled, waving. Her mouth opened and
she said, "Bye!" I was petrified but still couldn't say what the
woman wanted. It was not until I was in my twenties that I confronted
my mother about it. She had no idea what I was talking about at
first, then exclaimed, "Oh! I used to look in on you, yes. I might
have waved and said "hi" but I would never have gone along with what
she said. In fact, I took you out of there because I saw her hit you
once. She threatened me with Child Services and everything, but I
wouldn't bring you back to her after that." I replayed the video
memory in my head many times after that, and realized that "hi" and
"bye" look very similar when you're lip-reading at five years old.
That one revelation all but erased years of built-up anger towards her
for wanting to leave me just because I couldn't talk right.
I also once heard my mother say "I'm all out of panty-liners" when she
had really said "I'm all out of candy bars." I had no contextual
reference at the time, and an argument ensued because I responded in
what I thought was a helpful manner while she thought I was teasing
her. It was the first time I remember that she withdrew and asked me
what I'd heard, rather than both of us just storming off into our
separate corners. I was in my late teens at the time.
My vocabulary never suffered that much, though, because Mom, God bless
her, taught me the value of the Written Word at a VERY early age. In
fact, my coping mechanisms were strengthened greatly by my love and
appreciation of the written word. I didn't learn words by hearing
them, I learned them by reading them. Eventually, I knew so many that
when I didn't understand a spoken word, I could look up the sounds in
my internal Dictionary and figure out what was really said by making
comparisons to other words that might sound similar. Sometimes, I
hear an unfamiliar word only to realize I never knew how it was
pronounced, just spelled! Then my brain makes a new connection.
And yes, background noise is horrible. Just horrible. Crowds are
worse, but they make me give up entirely so it's less taxing.
Background noise means I /should/ hear but I don't, and it puts
tremendous strain on my energy reserves while I try to compensate.
~w
20100526
20100523
Standard search
When I start getting more serious about a new vehicle, what I think I will do is go visit every dealership in a hundred mile radius of here and simply say I am comfort-finding.
My desires for a standard will start with these items:
I get into car and can twist around to see out back of me. If I cannot see easily, the car is done, right there.
I do not feel too cramped, no immediate backache, no confinement of arms with seat pulled forward into my positioning.
Once these requirements are met, then I would ask Questions:
Mpg?
Cost?
Features available?
And other things I might think of.
If all of the above meet my desires, then I would want a test drive. This would be a final determining factor, but I would not buy right then and there, but rather, continue this process until I found a couple strong possibilities. Then I would need to make a decision!
Another method to get accustomed to models would be to ask friends if I can sit in the driver's seat and take a peek around... :)
-w
20100522
Lisa
mention that Lisa, my rat, is safe and sound despite my stupidity.
Whenever I'm at my desk (often) I let her run around my desk, stealing
food if it's present. She's finally become quite content with this.
Last night was one of these nights. However, she was enjoying herself
so much that she had an extended run of the desk before finally
situating herself back in her tank. Meanwhile, it was nearing my
bedtime, and I began to doze off. I caught myself doing this and
ventured up to bed, completely forgetting that Lisa's tank was still
wide open.
I awoke this morning at 6am, still ruminating over the iPhoto issue,
when suddenly I saw her little face looking at me through my mind's
eye. I sat bolt upright, realizing that at that very moment it was
entirely possible that she'd ventured out during the night, one of the
cats heard her, and, my presence being elsewhere, she ended up
shishkabobbed on one of their claws. I began having unwelcome images
float through my head at what I might find on my way down the stairs.
Thankfully, the blessed little soul either stayed in her tank safely
tucked away in her sleeping box, or the cats are so accustomed to her
noises that they didn't realize the peril they could have put her in.
From now on, she has a curfew so when I hit mine she's not forgotten.
~w
picture havoc
right now, but thankfully I had a good night's sleep and was able to
get over my confusion and anger long enough to figure out what had
happened. It also helps that I know I have a backup of the photos
themselves.
Over the past couple weeks, I've been going through my iPhoto library
(the final resting place of all my photos once they've been processed
and backed up). While browsing my shots, I began to find pictures
that couldn't be found. I.e., I could see them in iPhoto, but trying
to open them beyond their thumbnails and ratings and other db stuff
would tell me screw you, cannot find it.
[In case you don't know, iPhoto is a program from Apple that acts like
a photo warehouse. It displays photos in small visuals until you
click them. It also allows you to describe the pictures, categorize
them, and organize them, as well as do some minor retouching.
Typically, my photos get copied to the directory iPhoto uses to find
the pictures, creating yet another copy of them in itself.]
I tried repairing the whole library and got scads of these missing
items. Scads. Then last night I discovered a brand-new missing photo
that I know I just barely put in there. Something wasn't right. So,
I realized it wasn't just older stuff since 2009, but also newer
stuff. No apparent pattern at all!! It couldn't be corruption of one
directory, etc, because it concerned pictures from all over the map.
After some research I came up with this:
http://forums.macosxhints.com/showthread.php?p=559846
This turns out to be exactly what my problem was: Somehow, a little
checkbox in the preferences on importing pictures into iPhoto was
clicked off along with the color profile embedding. User-style, of
course, I don't recall unchecking this or even knowing of its
existence, but it was unchecked. What this unchecking did was create
"shortcuts" to the pictures. Well, since I thought iPhoto was still
importing the pictures into itself, I've been freely moving my
directories at will. What confirmed this for me was finding some
website pictures go missing. In February, I began using iWeb for my
website design and moved all my sites' RapidWeaver folders off the
hard drive to an external one. The pictures that were in there had
been copied into iPhoto and I just noticed them to be missing. So I
tracked down the aliases and figured out where they had pointed to.
When I saw "rapidweaver" I knew exactly where those had gone to.
While I know I've lost /some/ photos, those don't matter because they
were off the 'net and not my own precious memories. I probably have a
time machine backup of them if I look hard enough. And, I have all
the missing filenames, so it's not difficult to restore things to
perfect balance and harmony. Everything is named by date so finding
them is super easy. The problem now is my hard drive space. That's
the original reason I moved crap off my hard drive in the first
place!! So, I'm looking into two things: 1, upgrade my hard drive to
a larger one and 2, using this helper program called iPhoto Buddy
(http://www.iphotobuddy.com/) to split up my library into smaller
pieces (by year, perhaps). The smaller pieces could be archived to a
couple externals for safekeeping, leaving me with more recent items to
enjoy. Eventually, I plan to pare down the library anyway (one reason
I was going through it). This would also make it easier on me to
revamp the hard drive a bit later because things would be more
manageable. (Currently, I'm not planning to clone the drive; I want
to start fresh with a new OS.)
Anywho, I need some time off work to futz with the hard drive piece,
but my backups can be brought in little by little in the interim. No
sweat.
Very relieved Mac user who was actually able to figure out what the problem was,
~w
20100520
Welts
Second, I was so irritated with it that I bent my arm like a n00b and
gave myself a nice string burn. Then I got so ticked off that I tried
being a righty for a while and gave myself a nice pair of three-inch-
long arrow burns on my right hand, complete with two oozy scratches at
either end. Nothing major, but enough to remind me that I'm a left-
handed archer and that this bow SUCKS.
Compensating for the design of the crappy bow, I did manage to hit the
target three times out of 44 attempts. It would have been 45 attempts
but I lost an arrow in the swamp on the second round.
My arrow maker is going out of business, too. Dammit.
At least the third round had all the arrows in the same general area,
an indication that I'd begun adapting to the darned thing.
I want a machete.
~w
20100515
The Simple Life
peeks out now and again, but for the most part, it's slightly humid
with an overcast of clouds. I sit here typing this whilst drinking
Ovaltine and some wheat berry bread that Dale made from a box mix in
our breadmaker. Usually we make bread in that thing with ingredients
kept on hand, but he likes this particular type of bread and finds the
box recipe yummy enough. So, boxed it is. This time. ::rubbing
hands together::
As for me, I'm not overfond of the stuff, but a couple warm, fresh
slices cannot be passed up. This modest meal comes after a short
while outside, wiping down my truck's windshield, the interior, and
the side windows. I rainx'ed the windshield and then proceeded down
the slope of the yard to the four truck tires I piled up down there.
Today I planted the sprouted potatoes that have been growing in our
cupboard much of this winter. We'll see what happens.
In our raised beds, freshly tilled (and one long one freshly made by
Dale just this past week!!), I've already planted a row of lettuce and
a row of peas. In two weeks, I'll plant another row of each, and two
weeks later, another row. The idea is to avoid being inundated with
too many veggies at once and extend the harvest. Once all danger of
frost is past, I'll also be planing a plethora of other vegetables and
a few melons. Some, I'll need to plant all at once, but others I will
also stagger the plantings.
Our strawberry plants made it through the winter. In fact, they
appear to be quite hardy indeed. The one that gave us three
strawberries in its very first season has tripled in size this spring.
The others spread somehow, and it has been made obvious that they
plan to take over the original garden plot. The green onions,
meanwhile, aren't complaining about it. They are thick and about to
blossom, obviously unconcerned about the potential threat. This is
their third year of providing for me and all I did was plant two rows
of seeds three years ago. They, and the strawberries, are the easiest
things we've thrown in our garden! They simply take care of
themselves!!
In the house, meanwhile, Dale planted some tomatoes and peppers. The
tomatoes took right off and are about three or four inches tall in a
matter of weeks. The peppers just began sprouting a few days ago and
now we have a few that are nearing an inch. Dale is very excited.
Very. He plans to build the biggest, baddest, most securest fence
around his pepper plants that can ever be built, and no cat is going
anywhere near the would-be litterbox. This will be our second attempt
to grow peppers. I hope that with the fence, he'll succeed in his
endeavour. I'd really like to see him eating his own peppers in a few
months. I can just picture the joy on his face!
Earlier in the week, Dale borrowed my truck to get a good deal of
mulch. I took his car to work. We each had our excitement. While I
was full of adrenaline telling everyone how I successfully drove a
standard into work that morning, he was off watching mulch get dumped
into the bed of the truck, making the suspension bounce up and down
with trucky glee. He told me later that seeing this would have made
me feel proud. He also admitted that he felt sorta "macho" driving
that thing. I told him about my adventures with his car, and also
admitted that I kinda felt "cool" driving THAT thing. We exchanged
happy, impish smiles and agreed that we'd have to swap off now and
again. A colleague called the car "the twitchy fun car" and somehow
Dale called the car "Twitchy" as if that is the name. For me, it's
stuck. Ha.
We also went over to a friend's house and had a good meal, some nice
conversation and watched Avatar (for us, the second time). It's the
second time we went there and enjoyed their hospitality, and have
determined that we need to invite them over here sometime soon.
Dale has a colleague at work who is Chinese. He asked her about tea
for me and she rather promptly came into work with a couple of samples
for him to take home to me. I wasn't expecting such a surprise and
was thoroughly excited. After an hour of debate with myself over the
very familiar flavour, I have determined that it must be Da Hong Pao.
The packaging is all in Chinese so I'll have to wait for Dale to ask
her to make sure I am correct. I am certain that it's an oolong, and
only a bit less certain that it's a wuyi of some sort. I will not be
surprised, however, if I have determined the exact flavour. I had
purchased a bag of the stuff from a more local distributor a good year
ago, and despite not having it for a while, recall the multiple levels
of flavour it provided my palate. I also seem to recall thinking that
da hong pao reminded me of Kukicha (the twig version, not green). I
had this same impression from the unknown sample I tried this morning.
Of course, now I want to give his colleague something in return for
this combination of detective work and wondrous enjoyment of taste.
I've decided on two jars of locally made fruit spreads. I was at a
loss at first, but after reviewing several sites on Chinese culture,
these seem like a good idea somehow. Apparently it is not good luck
to receive an odd number of items so this is why I'm doing two rather
than one; in addition, I wanted to ensure the possibility that at
least one is liked. Chinese supposedly appreciate food that is local
to the gift giver (especially if it's new to them, hm, we've got lots
in common there). They also seem to like sweets. Finally, they're
very socially-oriented so I figure they would want to share. Granted,
these are all generalities, but I figure it's all close enough to
American thoughts on gifts that I can't go horribly wrong and my gift
will, at worst, not be fully appreciated by one or more Chinese
palates. I'm guessing, though, that with two different flavours, at
least ONE will be liked by someone. And it means an even number of
items to avoid the potential of an unlucky number. The most I need to
do now is make sure I don't put them in a white or blue bag upon
delivery. White's apparently for death and I have forgotten what blue
is but it's a no-no. I found my research quite interesting. While I
find it entertaining that so many cultures live by what some consider
superstition, I also respect the various ways of people and their
beliefs. So, to learn new things about people, that's cool.
There is something very wonderful to be said for having some simple
things in life. On this lazy Saturday afternoon, we've already
maintained our vehicles, cared for a garden which will provide us with
home-grown, organic food, and enjoyed simple food. Later we will
visit the nearby store and purchase a few staples. Everything we need
is within a half-hour of here, including work. We're surrounded by
greenery and a beautiful house. Our critters are healthy and we're
healthy, too, other than the few minor pains of creeping closer to
middle age and the occasional struggle with an old injury.
Life is _very_ good. I have found that I am quite content in this
environment. There is nothing wrong with being laid back and doing
things for oneself and one's family.
~nv
20100410
I love my iPad
SCREEEEEEAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMM omg it is soooo coooollll!
Sent from my iPad
20100408
POEM: Internment
2010040841 - c2010 WLC
I'm well aware of strengths I have
And quite aware of weaknesses
I know this love I have inside
Too well I know of speechlessness
My fingers, then, are like an army
Marching in a symphony
Pouring out the things I can't
Express without their tympany
For in my throat, a struggling bird
Long imprisoned in its stir
Riding out the storm and waiting
For its freedom to occur
What if, perchance, it waits for naught?
What if it is forever caught?
Never once to truly sing?
Never once to say a thing?
This is my weakness, my desire
I cannot sing, yet still aspire
To feel the easing of release
Permit expression, inner peace
So joyful would her singing be
If only once outside this cage
Her voice could open and be free
Instead she's caught within her rage
~nv
20100331
Photography thoughts
photography that I like.
1. New gadget syndrome: The process of learning all these new
features and testing the waters without any real professional
understanding. This is the process in which the camera becomes one
with my body. The features aspect can take a few days to a couple
weeks, but the bonding comes with experience.
2. Picture-taking: This comes after the camera has become a part of
my body. It's when I see a shot I want and get it without thinking
about how to do so. It's the slightly less creative side of me
because it's more intuitive than thoughtful.
3. Push-to-limits syndrome: This is when I've exhausted everything I
can find in the features and have indefatigably attempted the same
shot over and over with no success, then get really close by using a
flashlight or some other means to trick the camera into doing what I
want, or close to it. This is the point where my interest peaks
briefly during a tertiary creative phase, then flattens out into
disgust and aggravation when even creativity has found its limit.
Maverick hit that last point a year after I met Dale. Oxide and
Obsidian did not get there naturally, because Oxide tried to byte the
dust on me and Sid was overshadowed by the exceptionally better camera
Dale has been using which gave me shot ideas I could not obtain with
the equipment I had. Hence, early retirement as I spring into the
world of SLRs.
Very interesting analysis, though, for so early in the morning.
(9am) LOL
~me
20100330
Dream
He's sweet. The flash appears a bit more natural, it does better in
low light, etc. But on a night when I cannot sleep, his complexity
and myriad of features had me reading his manual. This meant that
something was on my mind as I fell asleep.
As such, I dreamt of photography.
So, last night I was content and asleep, and I'm dreaming of this cool
shot. I don't even remember what it was. But in my dream, I raise my
camera and go to press the button and - SOMEONE grabs my BOOB!! There
was no one in the dream so I open my eyes and after several confusing
moments, realize my hand was acting out the dream.
That hand caused me a good shot. Well, sorta. Okay, considering I
can't even remember what the shot was, and it would have been a
temporary one anyway considering it was only in my head... I suppose
it's a good thing that I woke up just before the alarm. Still... not
the first time my hand has woken me up out of a sound sleep. One
night I woke up and my hands were fluttering in my face. I remember
recognizing the flutters as sign language and was able to interpret
much of it, although it was a bit incoherent. Then I realized I'd
been signing in my sleep. I've also woken up and found myself typing
in my sleep.
My hands are apparently quite vocal at all hours of the day. I've
often wondered if they're not even mine...
~w
20100308
0111 Things I love
0001. I LOVE FIREFLY.
0010. I LOVE RED DWARF.
0011. I LOVE OSMANTHUS OOLONG.
0100. I LOVE GOOGLE. Get this - Dale says, "Huh. Says to register
but doesn't give a phone number." Two seconds later: "Dale, it's xxx-
xxxx." Google at my fingertips. I loves its.
0101. I LOVE THE INTERNETS. For which # 0100 would not have been
possible in the way it is.
0110. I LOVE GOOD BUSINESSES. I recently got orthotics for what I
felt was a developing case of Plantar Fasciitis. All the signs were
there, but only in winter for the most part, so I'd ignored it for a
good two years or so. The guy was great, gave me some helpful advice,
etc, but I didn't listen as well as I should and then even after
taking it really easy the pain had only increased while wearing the
orthos. I began to wonder if perhaps my foot was worse than I'd
thought and maybe I should have seen a doc before getting orthos. So
I called a podiatrist. The lady was really nice and I explained the
issues briefly to which she immediately asks, "How long have you tried
breaking them in?" I'm like, "A week." (This is about what I thought
the guy told me.) She laughs and informs me that I should definitely
give it more time, at least a month, and that I should only wear them
an hour one day, two hours the next, etc (what the guy told me, and
I've been averaging one or two hours a day since the first few days of
way-too-long-and-I-admit-it). She also told me that if there's pain,
I'm pushing too hard and should cut back until I can push more. So I
ended up not making the appointment, and she seemed fine with that.
It is VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY RARE for a doctor's office to give such
advice over the phone let alone doing so without a) me being a patient
and b) not getting immediate business out of the deal. Of course, I
am now in awe and assuming my foot turns out good I will promote the
office to the ends of the earth, so in the end, they still win.
0111. I LOVE DALE. I know this goes without saying, but I have to
mention this because it's true and it's important to reiterate
awesomeness. What are some of the things he's done or said lately to
deserve this praise? Lots of things. Mostly little things. The
smile on his face, the light in his eyes; they always capture my heart
and hold it a willing prisoner. A couple days ago he reminded me to
do something that was financially beneficial to me. He helped me help
my [our] friend move. He's patient with me. He doesn't argue, only
expresses his opinions or thoughts and lets me do the same, coming to
conclusions with me rather than forcing things down my throat. He's
willing to help me with projects, the few I have that welcome more
extensive involvement. He's fun to go out and do stuff with. TV Time
is made even better by his presence, even when we don't talk much.
Meals take less time and are more fun because of him. English Muffin
Pizza. Taco Bell. Stair Pong. Yep. I love the guy. What can I say?
20100220
Osmanthus Oolong
My recipe:
2 TBS Osmanthus Oolong
Heat 18oz water to just barely starting to bubble (you know that
growly sound the pot suddenly makes when the bubbles are about to form?)
Pour over tea and brew for 2.5 minutes
Strain
O...M...G...
~w
20100217
Poem: Bubbles
2010021731 - c2010 WLC
Tiny bubbles cling together
Floating in a pool of amber
Surrounded by a wall of green
Popping tiny breaths unseen
I sit here up against my mum
Playing Scrabble as you curl
Blissful in my solitude
But not without my gratitude
For when you're gone
Our love goes on
Inside a happy dancing heart
We are never quite apart
I watch TV on the internet
Never trying to forget
The happy looks that you provide
Without you, we'd not survive
The door swings wide
You walk inside
I drink the bubbles in my cup
I'll see you when I wake up
20100216
spinach
...AND LIKED IT!!!!!!!!!
GAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M ALL GROWNED UP!!!!!!!
WAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
20100118
damned if you do...
Earlier today I was at work. This lady calls up and says, "Mr. Brown
is here from XYZ company and needs to get on our wireless network.
It's asking for credentials. What are they?"
After the usual verification stuff, I tell her the password he'll
need. She says, with a slight edge suggesting that she wants to make
darned sure she understands me right, "That's ALL he's going to need
to enter? Nothing else?" "Nope," I say, and I hear "Okay, thanks,"
and the click of her hanging up. I continued talking to the phone as
I also hung up: "unless, of course, he's got one of those clients
that defaults to 64 bits instead of 128 bits in which case he'll need
to look for that setting on whatever client he's got and change it to
the other one... but if that's the case I'll find out soon enough
because you'll call back."
Then I hear a very soft snicker on the other side of the cubicle and
begin to laugh to myself, because I realized I hadn't given her all
the information he /might/ need, not because I was trying to screw
anyone, but because I knew the chances of him /having/ that type of
client were likely slim. In the past, I'd give too MUCH information
just to be safe, and end up confusing the dickens out of someone
because 9 times out of 10 they didn't need the information in the
first place. 'Tis best, at times, to leave out typically-unimportant
information and provide it on a need-to-know basis even if it means
someone has to call back (which makes me appreciate having to call
people back, now - the person was being thoughtful about my level of
understanding by refusing to confuse me with a bunch of inapplicable
crap). Still, I had to voice this concern, so I made it known to
myself as a muttered sidenote aimed at her hang-up click.
I.T. support is an art form. In addition to reading minds, we have to
quickly disseminate only needed information for equipment we can only
make guesses at while an agreeable but intensely busy person on the
other end waits for your pleasantly helpful voice to spew forth easy-
to-understand, nontechnical information that's highly complex and
technical in nature.
~nv
synesthesia
http://scienceblogs.com/cognitivedaily/2010/01/synesthesia_and_the_mcgurk_eff.php
SPOILER BELOW... if you want to listen and watch for yourself, you can
read this after you're done...
The interesting thing about what occurred when I watched:
1. neat, neat?, peat, peat. neat, neat, peat, peat
2. neat, neat, peat, peat. neat, neat, peat, peat
Note "neat?" is where he says people hear "meat." I /did/ think I
heard meat, but it sounded too nasalised, and I was very very confused
by the fact the lips didn't match perfectly what I was hearing. It
was like it was out of synch or something. At first I figured I heard
him wrong, began comparing what I'd seen to his voice as I watched the
next word come forth, couldn't figure out why the sound was off so
badly that it didn't match the sound correctly, and ultimately
concluded that he'd said "neat." I based this on context, because he
never said he was going to say "meat" but /had/ mentioned the word
"neat" and repeated it later on.
After I got myself all confused, I found myself reading below as I
listened to and half-watched the second part, and realized he /had/
said "neat" and that he was superimposing his speech on top of an
original recording of "neat, peat, neat, peat."
So: In short, I /did/ do what he said most people do, but due to the
synchronization problem, I wasn't 100% certain I heard him correctly.
Then I pulled a CAPD compensation and found "neat" was the only
obvious word he could have used in that strange context, so I fixed
what I heard with what I thought I should have heard.
If he /had/ said "meat" with the same synchronization issue, I likely
would have gotten that wrong, especially after I'd heard the whole
thing.
~nv
20100116
Dream Last Night
and reminiscing. Suddenly I hugged her, very glad to see her again,
and she said something about always having been there and not going
anywhere. I said, "I miss the past, not some of the things in it." I
woke up, very much desiring to remember that line, and found that I'd
been crying, truly happy to have seen her so vividly again and sad
that it wasn't real. WTF? I kept repeating that line over and over
as I fell back to sleep, though, and... there it is. So succinct...
20100104
Full Circle Writing
Today it was inspired by this site, which speaks of handwriting: http://www.hopechestlegacy.com/index.php?page=writing-desks
It has just dawned on me how history often repeats itself, and how
things often come full-circle. Is this beginning to occur with
literacy in some places? Doing much genealogical research as of late,
I am quite familiar with the concept that last names were often
misspelled or misread during censuses, and how many folks were so
illiterate they scarcely could write their own names.
So is this how it is to be, then? A good majority of the populace
able to write well, but a tiny percentage in comparison able to write
properly? Shall we have scribes again?
I hope not.
~nv
20091223
music
If people with APD have trouble hearing pitch and other musical
nuances (even going so far as to NOT APPRECIATE music because it's not
processed well in the first place!) then...
WHAT AM I MISSING?!
I get a heck of a lot out of music, I really do... a lot more than
many people do. Is it that I'm so far improved that I'm aware of so
much? Or am I still missing important pieces, even when I'm fully
alert and listening in otherwise complete silence?
I was just listening to Gravity by Vienna Teng and realized that MANY
of the words she sings have no similarity to the words I know she's
singing. I always felt she sang fairly clearly, but... at the current
volume, with me feeling sleepy, it's darned near impossible for me to
hear /exactly/ what she's singing.
"hayla, is that the name you're meant to have, for me to call, the
lookeylah, we've given up believin', we've turned aside our stories of
our gentle fog/fawd/fawn"
There are a /lot/ of things there that I'd have misheard were it not
for context and printed lyrics, which I distinctly recall reading
several times, memorizing. I can still picture the words as she
sings, as if I'm following along.
"So don't turn away now, I am turning in revolution, these are the
scars that silence called on me... This is the sayin' place, no not
the saying place, this is the sayin' place no, no not the saying place
we've been before, hayla, I am a constant satellite of your blazing
sun/son/song, milo, I ill be your law of gravity..."
yeah, okay, but I /am/ tired. Still, if I can easily tell what I
"hear" despite knowing what she is "singing" then what am I missing
due to NOT knowing ahead of time?
~whimpering me~
CAPD version 18763
--- from http://www.ldonline.org/article/6390#anchor528829 :
Phonological awareness
Phonological awareness is the understanding that language is made
up of individual sounds (phonemes) which are put together to form the
words we write and speak. This is a fundamental precursor to reading.
Children who have difficulty with phonological awareness will often be
unable to recognize or isolate the individual sounds in a word,
recognize similarities between words (as in rhyming words), or be able
to identify the number of sounds in a word. These deficits can affect
all areas of language including reading, writing, and understanding of
spoken language.
Though phonological awareness develops naturally in most
children, the necessary knowledge and skills can be taught through
direct instruction for those who have difficulty in this area.
---
My comments:
Unless visual abilities are pronounced and can compensate for the
Auditory Processing deficits. I /know/ this, because of the memory I
have of my mother reading to me when I was a child. Seeing her finger
sliding across the page, pointing at the squiggly lines and the
pictures, the mild change in tone of voice... I had no bloody clue
what her voice was doing other than indicating a change, some sort of
accentuation. But somehow I figured out that the squiggles were
symbolic of the pictures, and I learned to read.
The reason I know that I learned the words separately from the sounds
at first is because I've read many, many words which I hear much later
in life and go, "How do you spell that?" When it's spelled, I
immediately recognize it and understand its meaning from past written
contexts. The second reason is less certain, but still pretty darned
certain. That would be the lack of sound in my head as I read and
write. Sometimes I do hear soft whispers nowdays, but in the past it
was always silence or pictures. Mostly it was a dark void, two-
dimensional, as if the pictures needn't exist along with the concepts.
Query #1: Did I see auras so prominently as a child because of the
APD? I don't see them as frequently now, and I also have less trouble
understanding people than I used to.
Query #2: Why haven't I seen more connexions between APD relief and
musical studies?
Anywho, just some ponderings.
~me
20091213
sensory overload
images that floated through my head as my fingers moved across the
keyboard, and realized that perhaps I'm in one of _those_ moods. So,
I'll share this tidbit.
--- Regarding a teapot and teacup that was gifted to me a few years
ago: ---
You know, I realize this was a years-ago gift at this point, but it's
one I still appreciate just about every day. The cup is just the
right size, perfect colour, and perfectly balanced in its weight. The
pot I find to be of similar design as far as weight and colour, and
it's an excellent spot to store tea while I drink my first cup or
two. It's also good for guests when everyone's good with one kind and
strength of tea. (I have come to find the great majority of our
guests do not deviate from bagged teas anyway, so this point is hardly
ever an issue anyway, and my mother-in-law, who loves Ceylon Sonata as
much as I do, thinks my brew perfect for her taste.)
Note that I tend to use the teapot mostly in conjunction with the
Ingenuitea infuser that Dale got me... i.e., I use the teapot more as
a decanter than for brewing; the brewing is left to the infuser, which
is truly ingenious in its design.
The reason this gratitude has snuck in so strongly this morning is
because I've been browsing other teawares while sipping a third round
of Da Hong Pao from the little teacup. On and off I've tried to find
something that's exactly what I might want, and I cannot find anything
nicer than what I have. I have found some pots with infusers, and
cups with infusers - nice ideas, admittedly - but they're either too
large or I don't like the style/colour. I like the simplicity
inherent in what I've got, and the colour is exactly right. Probably
the closest I've got to proximity would be the Bodum pots with the
infusers. But even those somehow lack the grace the green one exhibits.
So, once more, thanks for such an awesome gift. The only reason I
continue to poke around, I think, is because I want to find just the
right thing for work. Alas, I simply don't see this happening anytime
soon. There's simply something to be said for a warm pot of tea
sitting on the table waiting to refill the cup, and the more I think
about it, the more I realize that I am seeking an impossible
collaboration of convenience and sensory fulfillment.
Funny thing, as I get older, I tend to appreciate warmth and
simplicity over streamlined chaos. This, even though my habit of
overlooking chaos has yet to diminish thoroughly enough to put things
away in a more timely manner. Right now my desk is full of braille
books, gadgets, and little slips of paper, and it is bugging the
absolute CRAP out of me because there, amidst the clutter, sits the
perfect cup of tea, lost in the insanity of my self-fulfilling life.
Its neighbours at the moment consist of a mouse from last night's
gaming, two bottles of ink, netflix rentals, a camera, my work badge,
a crumpled-up dollar bill, a half-eaten chocolate bar (which I'm
surprised has not attracted cat fur yet), an earring, two pens, cookie
cutters, parchment, and the aforementioned items. Gah. This is only
a few days' worth of clutter, mind you. At least I now clear my desk
twice a week, which is more than I could say for the me from a year ago.
--- end of email ---
poached eggs
very long time.
A second infusion of Da Hong Pao tea, a PERFECT poached egg (I've
finally got it, I reckon!!), two slices of moderately buttered toast,
and a clementine.
I don't know what a "good" poached egg is "supposed" to be like, but I
do know that after at least a dozen attempts at them and a few video-
watchings online, I created the best one I've made yet. I have
learned that you heat the water so there's steam and little bubbles at
the bottom of the pot. It needs about two to three inches of water in
a pot large enough to comfortably swirl water in. You add 2 teaspoons
of vinegar (or thereabouts). Then you stir the water so it's very
swirly, and before it slows too much, you drop in the egg. The
vinegar supposedly helps to keep the white from drifting into bits and
the swirling motion wraps it around itself, helping to keep it
together in a neat little package. I then turn the heat down below
halfway and move the pot so the egg's resting spot is not directly
over the burner. This keeps the water hot without searing the egg to
the bottom of the pot, you see. I figured that one out myself after
ripping the thing apart so the yolk flowed - against my will - into
the water rather than onto my toast.
Oh, and then... you let it sit there for ten minutes, or to desired
consistency. Ten minutes seems to be perfect for me.
Last time I did this, it was pretty good. Today, however, I added two
final steps: Once the egg was done, I dumped it into a bowl of ice
water and made my toast. When the toast was ready, I dumped the bowl
of ice water (and egg) into the hot water to re-heat the egg.
Supposedly, the ice water "sets" the egg so it's easier to handle.
Restaurants apparently do this so they have eggs on hand when they're
ordered. It's easy for them to re-heat the eggs. I think this
setting action MADE my eggs perfect this morning. Mmm MMMMM!!
OH and I'll tell you, Da Hong Pao is AWESOME...
20091212
kitty cat cut
tried to help by getting her to face his way. In doing so, I
inadvertently put my thumb in harm's way and Kitty snagged a ragged
half-inch gash in its fleshy, sensitive little pad. Right in the
center. OW! I exclaimed, pulling it back (which likely caused the
majority of the tear).
I feel _very_ bad for mice and moles. They don't have stuff like
Neosporin and bandaids, nor are they big enough to clobber their
attacker should it be a-purpose. In this situation it was obviously
not a-purpose. Kitty was merely playing and didn't mean it, but
nonetheless I will admit that as I nursed by throbbing thumb I did
cast several dirty looks in her general direction.
~nv
20091208
Poem: Black Eternal
2009120822 c2009 WLC
I sit surrounded by love
Love sits, too, around the corner
Music fills this tiny room
This tiny room I call my mind
If I think hard, I still remember
The sweet escape within the ink
These days the joy just wants to hide
Afraid of being left behind
But now and then, the fancy strikes
I see the Braille, my paints, and then
The stack of paper, a dipping pen
Somehow calls the Muse again
I feel the bumps beneath my fingers
Sense the feeling in the paint
See the softly glowing pages
Alive with thoughts borne in my den
There they are, dancing here, across the page
Gently sculpted in Black Eternal
Perhaps the pages dry and crumble
Or make their way through Time Immortal
Like my love for you.
Poem: Ode To The Corner Store
2009120821 c2009 WLC
I love the corner store
For now and eve more
We live just down the street
And walk there in the heat
We've gone there in the snow
And baby, don't you know
We love the corner store
One night I wanted sour cream
I could have thought it but a dream
But with a skip and jump and hop
I wandered up to the historic shop
Where the sign hangs proudly in the back
Some people never seem to lack
The Spirit of the American Dream
It may rain, and it can pour
But we'll be walking through that door
To by some eggs or milk or meat
Or potato chips to eat
From our house, just one stone's throw
And fellow shoppers, don't you know
We love our corner store!
20091205
honey/vinegar
early to mid 1900's). One of the things it mentioned was a concoction
I'm quite familiar with, but with water added. I never thought to mix
it with water.
2 tablespoons each of apple cider vinegar and honey [typically I hear
"raw" honey but it can be difficult to come by]
Mix this in a glass of water and drink it, with or without meals. In
the book, it was said that some people drink it at all three meals.
I've also read that it's excellent when drunk chilled on a hot day,
sort of like lemonade.
The one caveat the book has not mentioned to my point in the reading
is that vinegar can be bad for teeth. I read online somewhere that to
minimize the possibility of damaging teeth, you can rinse your mouth
with water afterward. I'd think this is good practice anyway to
dislodge food particles if you're like me and don't like to brush
right after a meal (which to me ruins the fun of eating). If I
remember right, the acid in the vinegar reacts with the calcium in the
enamel of the tooth, and weakens it. It makes sense to me because if
you put vinegar on marble (which is also heavily infused with
calcium), it can eat through the stuff and at the very least, make a
horrible scar on it.
I don't tend to hold 100% stock in folk medicine, but I think that
before the doctors of today, people were generally more instinctive
and likely had a LOT of household remedies that did help with many
things. (I don't believe our current science is the ONLY science or
that it's infallible, either.) Additionally, many of /their/ ills
were likely due to both lack of medical/scientific understanding and
nutrition. Today, we don't suffer from many of their problems such as
plague, measles, scurvy, etc, but I think by and large our populace
has forgotten many of its collectively learned remedies. Over the
years I've found that some remedies /seem/ to work, and at the very
least, they don't hurt to try. So, when I woke up with a sore throat
shortly before our Thanksgiving weekend a couple weeks ago, I went all
out on the remedies I had tried in the past. I didn't get sick after
all. Maybe I wouldn't have. But I do know that the honey and vinegar
trick has saved me from sore throats several times, so while I don't
believe in everything I read or hear, I do tend to think those two
items indeed have value. I have strong faith in Garlic, as well.
Particularly raw.
One thing I find interesting about the book is that it mentions how
before the age of 25, the human body tends to require far different
nutrients than it does later, because before 25, the human body is
still building its systems. After that, it merely needs to maintain
them. From my own experience, I think the body goes through many
stages of requirements. As a child, I was very finicky, as my mother
could tell you. At first I ate everything she gave me, then I went
through a year or so of eating little to nothing (yet I was growing at
a good clip). At one point I would eat meat as if there were no
tomorrow, then abruptly, I wouldn't touch the stuff for years, or,
very little of it, and it had to be just right or it sat on the
plate. When I moved out on my own, I often tried eating hot dogs, but
it never seemed right to me somehow and now I have trouble eating
those, too, if not just the right kind and cooked just right. I got
into a junk food phase and then in my mid-twenties, I craved steak and
potatoes by spurts, which continued for a few years. Interspersed
with that was a need for fish, chicken, and rice with lots of frozen
veggies mixed in. (This is how many of my rice dishes were born.)
Then I met Dale and we discovered Indian food, and now I'm getting
more into tomatoes to a small extent, and I love the medleys of
spices. Thai has crept in there. I love variety. Lately it's been
Wendy's burgers and at home, rice, eggs, frozen veggies... the rice
dishes continue to draw my appetite.
So, tastes do change drastically over the years of one's life, it
seems. My mother admitted this to me herself but she tends to stick
with what she knows and is limited in her ventures out of fear for the
unknown. Me, I don't mind sitting on the toilet for a couple of days
if it means I have found a new spice to love. Granted, Mother was
right when she told me I have in the past tended to overindulge in
newly discovered foods. The curried rice when I was in my teens is a
very well-known example. I wasn't kidding about two days on the toilet.
Oh, and tea - I LOVE that stuff. I have noticed a few things,
though. First, I tend to drink the oolongs and blacks far more than
the greens, and most of the time they're all laden with caffeine.
Generally I do not touch decaf anything unless it's naturally lacking
the stuff. BUT. Despite all supposed health benefits from drinking
tea, it is one of those things that should be combined with lots of
water. The stuff is a major diuretic. Here are some things I've
noticed most when I get into my tea phases: My face turns kind of
ashen, like the blood refuses to rise to the surface, or there isn't
enough water in it. I pee a lot more and sometimes my sides have very
minor aches in them, as if my kidneys are working far harder than they
should be. I get headaches, as I just discovered. And finally, I
feel very dry - my skin, especially, but also some sort of inner sense
that fluid is lacking. If I limit myself to a small cup per day, I
don't notice these things quite as much, but more than that and
inevitably I see the signs.
EGGS! I love eggs. One or two eggs in the morning, with a small cup
of tea, a slice of toast, and a small bit of corn mush... this seems
to make me very alert until lunch. Tea alone is energizing but it's
more of a high than it is an overall sense of purpose. "They" are
right about breakfast - people do better when they have it. And I've
found that even at early hours, I can take an egg most of the time.
Speaking of which, even the folk medicine book mentions those
things... they have everything needed to build a chicken, so they're
powerhouses of nutrition.
Anywho, I don't know where I was going with all this. Perhaps I'm
just finger-blabbing. LOL I think that if it were not this day and
age of computers, I would likely have learned everything there is to
know about plants through much experimentation and note-taking.
Perhaps one of those medicine peoples, as it were.
~w
20091128
Recipe: Leftover Turkey Soup
I'm cooking. Still, I've made this twice in the past week (we had a
LOT of leftover turkey) and Dale and I LOVE the stuff. So, I thought
I'd jot it down for posterity, exactitude or no.
You will need:
A biga** pot
Water
Kasha
Carrots
Potatoes
Celery
Salt
Chicken Bouillion powder (or cubes)
Pepper
Curry Powder
Thyme
Parsley
Rosemary
Coriander (I like to grind my own, coarsely)
Lemongrass (the dried, ground kind)
Cardamom seeds (removed from outer shell and ground up)
Hoisin Sauce
Leftover Turkey
Leftover Turkey Drippings/gravy (include the fat!! yumyum) (about a
half-cup to a cup or more, depending on taste and how much soup you're
making)
01. Dump some water in the pot. Dump in some kasha. Don't worry
about making the kasha right because you'll had enough liquid to keep
it going. Turn it up to medium or so and let it start boiling while
you start working on other crap. Keep an eye on the water level, make
sure it stays liquidy.
02. Chop up some carrots and dump 'em into the boiling water/kasha as
you go.
03. Chop up some celery and dump it in.
04. Peel and then chop up some taters, dump 'em in. Again, make sure
the water level is at boiling, not too thick.
05. Sprinkle in some chicken bouillion powder and some salt. Not /
too/ much. The Bouillion is for added flavour; the salt can be added
later if there's not enough to begin with.
06. Continuing to watch the water level, pull apart the Leftover
Turkey and chop it up however you like. I steer clear of the fatty
areas and grisly parts, and of course, I never put in bone. (Who does?)
07. Add the remaining ingredients, including the drippings/gravy.
Here's an approximation of what I do:
For one big handful of chopped turkey, I do about 1 tablespoon of
curry powder, some freshly ground pepper (to taste), and 1/2 to 1 tsp
each of the other "bottled" spices. I add 2 tsp of the Hoisin Sauce.
Cardamom, probably two seeds. For each consecutive handful of turkey,
I add one more helping of all of the above.
I also start with one potato, one carrot (or sevenish baby carrots),
and one-two stalks of celery, and increase based on amount of turkey.
Turn down the heat to 1/4 the heat, and let it sit there for about 20
minutes. Stir now and again and add water to thin it out a bit as
needed.
YUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
20091126
painting
hit me. It's not perfect, and the colouring's off (which is REALLY
REALLY hard to do!!) but I'm quite proud of the eyes. I was surprised
by the one ear I did, too; I thought it would be harder than it was.
I think I worked on Sinclair for about two hours, mainly because I
slapped some paint around before settling into doing the eyes, then
once I had one of them in, I thought, OMG, I've gotta get serious here
and fix this... and then realized I needed to reconstruct the nose,
which was way too long. For a while, he looked like a one-eyed wolf,
then a Sinkie-Wolf, and now he just needs a bit more work to make him
back into just plain Sinclair.
Currently, I still have work to do on the nose, left ear, and the
lower part of his face, but for the most part, it's him. Note that
this is him in his full ruff and then some. I'll need to trim his
face down a bit to make it more realistic. The important part is that
I captured the essence of him!! :)
20091122
pianos
not. If I were to buy one, I'd want a really really nice one, one
that sounds a lot like a piano, has 88 keys, and weighted keys,
amongst less important features. However, I keep noticing in life
that sometimes waiting and buying something seemingly "too expensive"
or "too difficult" is really the better way to go, rather than getting
something cheaper/more portable/more numerous and later being
immensely dissatisfied with it. So, I'm slowly coming to the
conclusion that perhaps a new keyboard is not my answer, but rather, a
piano. This brought about a new problem. Would I be happy with an
upright? Do I only want a grand because they look so cool?
Consequently, I have recently read about some concerns over grands vs
uprights.
Speed. This is, by far, an issue for me right up front. As soon as I
read about it, memories sprung forth of a few pianos I have had the
pleasure of pounding on a bit. I've played a several uprights over
the years, and only one or two grands. By play, I mean, I got to
pound out a few songs that I'd memorized on my keyboards, one of which
is decently fast, because I created it; it's simple, and my fingers
like to _move_. Apparently the keys on an upright MUST return to the
original position before you can re-depress them. Grands, on the
other hand, do not. I remember at least one upright preventing my
song from going full speed ahead, and it felt to me that the keys were
taking _forever_ to come back up. The grand, on the other hand,
seemed very responsive to my touch, as weak as it was.
Tone. I want a nice, mellow tone, with a good range. To date, most
uprights I've played seemed tinny or harsh compared to the grands,
which are gentler-sounding.
Size. I knew size to be important, but figured a small baby grand was
always better than an upright because the strings were horizontal and
so was the sounding board. Plus, there's the cover that you raise
that lets some of the sound out! Well, I was wrong. Grands smaller
than 5' are not worth getting for the most part if you want good
sound. Many uprights will actually sound better. So, that told me
that I'd have to have at least a 5'1" piano or else I'd be unhappy.
Room size. This is why I'd want an upright over a grand. However,
with all I've read, I'd be willing to sacrifice more room to a 6'
grand rather than put up with harsher tones in an upright combined
with the less responsive nature of one.
Now, the question is, where the heck would I put this thing? Assuming
we stay in this house for some time, anything larger than a 6' would
be silly due to room size. That's a given. The room I current use as
my den would likely be best. That would mean moving my computers
around significantly. I can deal with that. I think I have a spot in
mind, then.
When?! Well, considering the pricetag (probably $12K unless I find a
good used one), I'd say several years after the house is paid off.
This might be a while. However, I'll think about it for a few years
and get back to you on that. After all, the house will be paid off
much faster than originally expected...
~nv
20091113
20091112
Poem: The Page
2009111241 - c2009 WLC
A twist of metal, shimmering
A twist of hope is glimmering
Sparkles catch like prisms split
Dazzling rainbow colours lit
Gliding by, another year
Quickly fading was my fear
Much has happened, never know
Tears dry quickly as we go
On the emptiness of space
Words of love emblazoned here
Feel our heartbeats gently race
Sensing things is oddly queer
In my book of life, ties scattered
Slowly do I build this house
Filled with distant, loving chatter
More silent even than a mouse
Across the pink hues of the sky
Slowly do I say goodbye
For one day as I head home
Seldom am I now alone
Surrounding me, the stars
In the sparkles of your eyes
Time immortal loves you more
Oh, how fast it seems to fly
Know the reasons when I cry
Are but wounds that seek to dry
When you don't feel on the page
Look beyond the saddened rage
And listen for the well of silence
Dripping tears for what's to be
Look into my eyes, you'll see
You are so much more to me
Helpful tip # 34,267: Earrings vs SD case
As I absentmindedly packed the earrings into the case and latched it,
I realized this might be a good travel case. So, there's your tip for
the day. What began as boredom soon became inspiration.
~w
20091111
20091108
correction on hamster link explanation
and thought it was a woman... but clearly it's a guy!! lol
Way cool cage setup (http://hamstertracker.com/Cage0010.html) too with
the treadmill. Dale and I have been talking about ways of doing this
ourselves, so to see one might be helpful.
This came about because Dale asked if Pippin could have peanuts (yes)
after I realized it might be best if the rats didn't have them... man,
the sites that are out there!!
In the meantime, I'd also found a few sites about rats and the various
toys people give them. Most of them I'd already tried, but one I
hadn't thought of was tying string to food and hanging it from the top
of the cage. I had one of the rats going after it but they gave up
since there was easier food to get to.
Hamster Gourmet Food
I think the lady's a genius. Geeky, too.
