Yesterday was awesome. First, Dale and I made plans to do some soldering together. Then a friend's wife called me to give me directions to this thing I had wanted to do and kept forgetting to sign up for.
So, Dale has this project he has been working on, similar to one he did before but this time a gazillion times better... More professional, nice design, etc. This time he designed his own circuitboard and would do his own soldering (with my help!) and it would all work! So we went to do the soldering and we had these tiny little resistors to stick onto the board. It really required three hands, because they were so small that they could move really easily off their assigned spots while you tried to apply the solder. So Dale held them with tweezers and I fought with the iron and solder. We did a lot of these! At least, it seemed like there were a lot. Then we did capacitors, which werealso tiny. It looked like I melted one and I got frustrated and nervous, but Dale was as usual unphased and merely encouraged me. So we finished four of those. Then I had to leave for something else, so he stayedbehind and I left.
This is where I can say that I never know what to expect.
After the soldering, I went to a ... Well, I cannot say yet because Dale might read this and he will find out soon enough about what it was about. Suffice it to say that in the process of doing that, I got to see a friend's wife, whom I have met a few times and found most entertaining. The dynamic of the pair was fun to watch the couple times I had seen them together, and I had thought to myself, it would be cool to get to know her better, become friends with the whole lot of them. (I had also found amusement in their children, the eyes of which shone with very similar personalities to their parents.)
What started out as idle curiosity, though, has begun to become more desirable to me lately because I worry that changes where I normally get to see my friend might lead to NOT seeing him, possibly ever again. So to see him/them outside of that realm, for me, is a good thing... To have that contact means more likelihood that should things occur to prevent the regular contact I currently have, I might have some other contact down the road and all would not be lost.
My worries are not unwarranted. I knew Stan, for instance, for about ten years and became very close to him during that time. I looked up to him as a role model because of his ethics and morals, and began calling him "dad" because, well, he was almost old enough to be a young father to me, he sometimes acted like my perception of one, and, since I had none to speak of anyway, why could I not choose one of my own? Lol But I digress. My point is that he was the greatest loss of several to me when I left that workplace. Thankfully, we still maintain a friendship outside of that realm, even if not often enough. But if we hadn't known each other so long and I had not made some effort, I may have had to resign myself to the chance meetings at the market. Blah.
My worries also stem from my childhood. I grew up in two states... Three, if you count where I emotionally grew up in addition to physically. I know not many children get to keep their friends their whole lives, but I was often different enough where it was hard to make and keep the few friends whose company I truly enjoyed... And then if I did make friends, I would soon be moving again. I did not find this much of a problem at the time but over time it began to wear me down and eventually I found solace behind a monitor. There, I made friends and I knew that if I moved I could take them with me. They were in this one box and even if I could not keep that one box, I could always find them in another one. It was awesome. Soon, though, I learned that not everyone put their online friends ahead of real life. Blah again.
At some point, I began establishing roots here... And met Dale, along with a myriad of new people which he brought with the merging of our lives. Then I switched jobs and met even more people. I began placing more emphasis on relationships and less on computerized ones, as scary as it was sometimes, and have found that I truly enjoy them, even if they can be tiring at times.
So, back to story before I lose it. I got to meet his wife again. Right. I also got invited over to their house after our activities were done. At first I was a little uncomfortable but that is of course normal. The children remembered me from before and that helped... For some reason, maybe because I am still "a children" in my heart, I get along easily with kids as far as finding something in common with them goes. I think he was a bit uncomfortable, too, because he was being very quiet and was not making any of his usual remarks or jokes or telling stories. Or maybe he was just lazing around the house on a saturday afternoon and did not really have it in him to be "normal." maybe this was a different side of him, we all have sides, right? Anywho, I can adapt, so I did. I took this as an opportunity to know the kids better and in the process of relating to them, kept one part of my mind on her, assessing, watching, learning. I discovered that at least in my presence, she is the primary authority for the kids and can be strict about preventing possible hurt feelings with others. I like that, because I have trouble drawing lines with children and this explained immediately why they show much restraint and respect despite their ages. As soon as I realized this, I was careful to be respective of it myself and cease any behaviour of my own that could teach the children that not everyone felt as she does about what they were doing. I saw it as advantageous to me, because it meant less conflict between them and us. I did not feel protective of myself because someone else was making sure I did not have to.
Her and I left to get pizza and in the process, she suggested I take some pictures of various ice sculptures. The venture of walking around with her was another opportunity to get to know her better and become more comfortable around just her. That worked amazingly well. She is very creative (duh) and I got to see some of the things she makes with yarn because we stopped in to a gallery where some of her work is displayed. I knew before that she is quite intelligent and uses it well, but I had not known much about the crafting side other than stamps from the last time we had met. One of the kids had also made some things there, and I was not surprised that it was the child I had long known to be most like her. My insides were all happy because I was beginning to like her on her own merits rather than what I kept hearing about her. I felt myself relax a bit and I hoped that my resulting layer of oddities would manifest as fun or eccentric and not just downright strange or eyebrow-raising. I never know what goes through someone else's head of course, but I am sure she was making similar assessments. What I do not have any clue about is whether those assessments were spurred because she wants to know me or whether she wants to know this person her husband knows, or whether she was just being polite and was getting to know me for his benefit. Whatever her motivations, I was happy to finally have a chance to get to know her, and perhaps establish a new friend in addition to establishing an external friendship with him outside of the usual realm.
Things seemed to be going well.
We eventually ended up back at their house, and she made chai for us (mmmmmm) after the pizza and other things we all came up with to do. He had come out of his odd quiet shell by now and I felt more at ease because the tension I thought I'd felt had melted, and I had food and mountain dew in me (oh yes they were quite nice and spared a Throwback, hee hee, that is another story).
I called Dale to let him know where I was, as I had expected to be home much sooner than it ended up being... In the end, I stayed late enough to see the kids go to bed and was surprised when one of them hugged me before tottering off to wherever they disappeared to for the night. I resolved not to stay much longer at that point, and called Dale again to let him know I would be on the road soon and he could expect me home in another hour to hour ten, depending on road conditions and the efficacy of my attempts to leave in a timely manner.
Oh! And Dale tested his freshly soldered board and discovered that it registers five volts, which was both expected and hoped for! Yay!!!!! Now he just needs one more part on the board and to program it, and put the rest of it together... ::tremble::
Surprisingly, my dreams are unmemorable. Usually when I experience new people and activities, I have vivid dreams, but not this time. I know my mind was digesting all the new information, though, because this morning I felt this need to write about the experiences from yesterday. I am sure that somewhere in those dreams, though, I was trying to figure out better ways to hold tiny little infinitismal resistors on a board... And for a split second when I woke up, I remembered the unrestrained openness of a child's hug and thought to myself that maybe I shouldn't be quite so tense in new situations. There is something rewarding about seeing oneself in a child's eyes.
Aight, the sun has already risen from our bed and taken off to seize the day, Dale following onits heels. I suppose it is time I do the same.
Carpe el diem!
~nv
